Passing A Drug Test
By Ex Narc, Barry Cooper
It is very easy to pass drug tests. As a former decorated drug agent and current activist who has been arrested numerous times, I know how to pass a drug test. Unfortunately, the United States has the largest prison population in the history of mankind. Tens of thousands of good souls have and are suffering in prison as an indirect result of failing a drug test. Millions have been denied jobs because of the unconstitutional testing of their urine and hair. In a humanitarian spirit of good will, I am sharing “Passing A Drug Test” with you. There are no detoxifier ads on this page. If you or a loved one has been arrested for any drug crime, recommend me as their expert. None of my clients are in jail. Not one.
Passing A Urine Test
If a urine sample is requested, simply go to the nearest head shop (smoke shop, pipe shop, novelty store) in the jurisdiction you are providing the sample and ask the clerk for the most powerful detoxifier everyone is using. Because of strict laws prohibiting the sale of systems that aid in passing a drug test, it’s important not to use words such as “drug test” or “probation” or “employment. If you use these words, it is likely the clerk will refuse to sell you the detoxifier because she suspects you are an undercover agent trying to sting the store.
The best detoxifier is usually the most expensive. Follow the directions EXACTLY as instructed in the packaging. Some detoxifiers come with a toll free number so if have any questions, you may call for help. I have never heard of these phone numbers being a trap. I have found the detoxifier operators are eager to help you find success with their product. To insure you purchased the correct detoxifier and are using it properly, always test yourself with a home drug testing kit before submitting a urine sample to the government.
Never make a court appearance without detoxifying first. Always ingest the urine cleaner before walking into ANY COURT APPEARANCE because courts oftentimes surprise defendant’s by ordering “on the spot” urine samples.
Sometimes, when a person has been arrested, as part of their bond agreement, they are instructed to immediately report for a drug test after leaving the jail. If this happens to you, go directly to a head shop and purchase the detoxifier before taking the test. If you are questioned why it took so long to arrive for the urinalysis, explain you were in a meeting with your lawyer.
Synthetic urines, simulated penises or using another person’s urine does not work when giving samples to a court. Court testers always watch the pee go in the cup so if the officer notices a fake penis, or balloon or anything unnatural, the citizen is immediately arrested and charged with “tampering” and the sample is considered dirty. Once the officer is certain he or she has collected a sample that came from your body, he or she will quickly pre test the urine and if it’s clean, the urine is flushed and is not sent to a costly lab for further testing. If the pre test is “dirty,” the sample is sent to a laboratory for more sophisticated testing. Depending on your legal situation, Sometimes the cops will arrest you on the spot and sometimes they wait for the lab results which could take days. If used properly, the detoxifying drinks always trick the pre test and often trick the labs.
Many urine tests for employment purposes bypass the pre testing and send the sample directly to the lab. In this case and if time allows, I recommend total abstinence from any drug use unless you know you are not going to be watched…then it is safe to use synthetic urines.
Passing A Hair Follicle Test
If a hair sample is required, you can purchase detoxifying shampoos from the same head shop. Again, follow the directions EXACTLY and you will pass. Bleaching your hair prior to the test will also cause you to pass. I know at least a dozen people who have passed hair tests by bleaching their hair and/or using the detoxifying shampoos. The idea is to “wash away” or compromise the trapped detectable toxins in your follicle. See the illustration below.
Read the really good information on how to pass a drug test in the comments below. Help contribute to this article by posting what you know about this subject. Share your information with us and share this information with others. It’s a senseless drug war.